On the Road Again!

I’m on the road again.
We’re drivng this time— 3 states, 5 cities, 2 weeks and countless public restrooms.
I have long joked that apparently my purpose in life is to visit every airport restroom in the USA—which has had its share of yucky moments, but that pales in comparison to the sense of adventure one feels when opening the door of a public restroom in an fast food restaurant, a gas station or rural convenience store.
It is like the final bit from the old game show—What lies behind the door—relief or angst?
I’ve had pleasant surprises—clean as a clean can be restrooms in run down convenience stores in the middle of nowhere or my favorite, sparkling public restrooms that smell of bleach. I’ve had some horror stories, such as one in Mississippi a few years ago that didn’t have a door between the restroom itself and the rest of the store, though most of the stalls had doors.
But I digress. While the cleaning habits of the store or restaurant management plays a large role in how good or horrific a public restroom experience may be it is the people who used the facilities before you who make the biggest difference. To this group of strangers I have a question.

Were You Born In a Barn?

Seriously! On what planet is the way you leave a restroom acceptable?
And if you are not one of these people, you know who you are, and you may join me in my irritation.
I have a short list of rules that I think we should put into place. We could even vote on them, if needed. The problem is, when people fail to follow these rules, it is the next person in line who pays the price.

Rule Number 1–Stop peeing on the seat.
I stopped at a a chain restaurant yesterday and made my “I’ve been in the car drinking coffee for 4 hours” run into the restroom— and it was wonderfully clean when I walked in and it was clean and dry when I left.
An hour later, I made my “better go before I get then car for another 4 hours” stop and went to the same stall. This time it had pee all over the seat. Seriously ladies, unless you can levitate and hit the mark, please stop this squat, aim and miss practice. This was a sparkling clean restroom, it had seat liners in each stall which are useless because someone PEED ON THE SEAT.
If you make a mess of the seat—and by mess I mean any bodily emission of any kind—clean it up before you leave. There is toilet paper right there, wipe up after yourself. Or be defined as nasty.

Rule Number 2— Flush the damn toilet.
Flush toilets are one of the best inventions in the history of the world, so use them. I don’t care if you “let the yellow mellow” at home all that does in public restrooms is mess with the plumbing by ending up with too much toilet paper to flush and eventual clogs. And make sure the toilet flushes before you leave the stall, Self-flushing toilets don’t always self-flush, but there is always a button to do it yourself. If one flush doesn’t do it, do a second, but make sure whatever you left in the toilet is gone before you leave the cubicle. View it as you would camping in a pristine wilderness… leave no evidence of your visit.

If everyone did just these two things, public restrooms would immediately improve on so many levels.